Please read the post-scripts and watch the video until the end. I promise it will be the best part of your day, and will remind you of the impact of this incredible activity.
As I write this, my youngest son is excitedly preparing for Halloween. I don't really know what his costume is; but I think it related to a knight. What I do know is that he has wrangled Riley, our two-year-old Golden Retriever into being an accomplice and dressing up as a dragon. We tried the costume on her the night before, and it was evident that she was NOT happy about the situation.
Me? I like dressing up. Always have.
My wife is in charge of costuming, and she is good at it. This year we are partnering with our friends and neighbors to be the characters from the iconic 80's film The Breakfast Club. She even made student IDs for us (to the right). As you can imagine, I am Brian Johnson, (the geeky character played by Anthony Michael Hall). When she asked what character I wanted to be, I told her that I see myself as more of a John Bender (a moody, broody anti-authority figure played by Judd Nelson). She just laughed. But, she's wrong!
I can totally see myself in the iconic closing scene, slowly walking off the football field as the sun sets with my fist pumped in the air! You see it too, right?
My wife says it is a bit of a stretch. I tell her that's what Halloween is—being something you're not, but are secretly (or not so secretly) wanting to be. Today, it's called Halloween. The other 364 days it's called Imposter Syndrome. According to Web MD:
Impostor Syndrome is, "someone who feels they aren't as capable as others think and fears they'll be exposed as a fraud."
It is more common than you think, especially in the world of work. Honestly, I have felt like an imposter most of my adult / work life. Let me explain.
As a teacher, I was terrified that my students would discover that I was faking it and didn't know as much as I pretended to.
As the program grew and found (considerable) success, I was scared my colleagues would see that it was all luck.
As an administrator, I was sure the teachers knew I was making it up every day and flying by the seat of my pants.
As a leadership speaker, I run from plane to plane, city to city, where people's opinions never catch up to me.
As the founder of Be Part of the Music, I sat across from C-Suite execs asking for their support, praying they wouldn't see me as the business neophyte I was.
As a write this (and every other e-zine), I worry that you are on the other end, rolling your eyes, laughing a sardonic laugh, and thinking, "This guy's a joke!"
I could go on, but you get the idea.
So yeah, you could say I have a bit of a condition. Heck, I am the model for Imposters Syndrome.
I have always felt like a bit of a fraud.
Am I the only one who suffers from this?
Do you ever feel that way? Do you ever worry that your seemingly unnoticed ineptitude will be exposed? Are you waiting for the world to discover what you already know to be true - that you are a fraud?
I genuinely hope so.
In an article in Active Beat, author Jay Hayward explains the phenomenon in a little more detail: "Those who have achieved some level of success are the most vulnerable to this phenomenon. They believe they have somehow cheated their way onto the podium, and at any minute, the floor will open up below them. Basically, they don't feel like they deserve their success."
As I said, I HOPE you feel that way. Why? Re-read the last sentence. It ends with "their success."
You can only have imposter syndrome with success; they go hand in hand, and one is required for the other to exist. Think about it: you would not suffer from imposter syndrome if you lived in your parents' basement, ate cold Spaghettios, and binge-watched Moonshiners. (That was oddly specific and definitely NOT true of me. Ok, but only parts).
If you feel like an imposter, it means you did your job and did it well. You chased success and caught it. You interviewed and beat everyone else out for the role. You taught your students at a high level and developed the program in a noteworthy way. You were reviewed, adjudicated, and determined to have done outstanding work that somehow exceeds expectations. You are a GREAT teacher!
Even if you don't feel like one.
This job is hard. You are an island unto yourself and are likely doing it alone. You are on display and judged and graded (literally) in front of your students, parents, and administration. The compliments are few and far between, and parents can be just as much a friends as they are a foes. You are a teacher, writer, public speaker, accountant, bus driver, creative designer, and custodian. You are many things and, in some cases, YOU ARE EVERYTHING.
Well, everything BUT an imposter! You're too good for that. And you realize that feeling bad just means you are doing good.
Have a great week.
Scott
p.s. THIS GUY! On Saturday night, I received a text and a video clip from a client. They had no idea that I know, respect, and adore this man, they just wanted to send me something that inspired them, and despite being seven states away, thought I might feel the same way. They were correct.
Adam Mewhorter is the Director of Bands at South Moore High School, just outside Oklahoma City. You may remember him from our efforts to raise money for him after a devastating category-five tornado tore through his community. You may also have seen the school yearbook picture he took in a band uniform. But, THIS is next level - and it makes me proud to call him a Patron, colleague, and, most importantly, a friend. Way to go, Adam! Click on the video and watch until the end.
p.p.s. This is the free edition of the e-zine for November. November is a content-filled month for Patrons. In addition to the weekly blogs, I am doing a live webinar on rethinking your career, weekly Student Leader Newsletters, and an upcoming gratitude activity for Thanksgiving.
I sincerely hope you like this content and will consider becoming a Patron - even if I feel like an imposter when I write it. :)
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